I love Valentines, (we have three children born in November) I mean I really, REALLY, love Valentines! Love is such a beautiful word and it’s meaning is so much deeper than a feeling…it’s a covenant. So is my marriage to Cindy. To enhance this covenant marriage I have 5 Valentine events scheduled for her:
1) Prime Rib dinner and flowers on the 13th (Provided by BNC).
2) Comedian Todd Oliver (Vegas, Branson entertainer) on the 14th (at BNC Bergman).
3) Taking her to Dallas on the 16th to stay in one of our favorite hotels.
4) Ruth’s Chris Steakhouse for dinner that evening on the 16th.
5) This event, #5 is what I really want to talk about. I have scheduled on the 16th a MARRIAGE COUNSELING appointment.
Cindy and I will be meeting with Dr. Jonathan Cude who’s office is in Los Colinas, Texas. I can already here the questions and pondering thoughts. What? Marriage counseling? Are they having problems? Has the pastor lost touch? Marriage counseling means I am weak, right? Getting counsel and wisdom means this…I value my marriage!! Cindy and I have the best marriage on planet earth…no, seriously the best! The truth is we, like every married couple, have matters that we want to overcome and learn how to be more effective in. I don’t want to see a marriage counselor when things are bad, I want to see one when things are going well. Cindy and I have desired this for years and are taking the first step, of many steps for the future. We are excited about every Valentines event, but this is TOPS for our Valentines 2010.
Pastors, leaders and married adults, be honest about your marriage and do what it takes to perpetuate your covenant to the next level. I will blog next week the outcome of learning from Dr. Cude.
What you think about my Valentine’s Plans? Comment here…
Amy Duncan says,
Chad and I did marriage counseling once with our former pastor in Florida. Our marriage was great! We didn’t go because it was bad, either, but because we wanted to enhance our marriage and spiritual life together. We learned things about each other that we didn’t even know after years of marriage. It brought us even closer together, physically, emotionally, spiritually, etc. I highly recommend counseling for any married couple!
on 09 February 2010 / 9:52 AM
Penny Ezell says,
I think this is fantastic!! In any relationship we need to be in constant discussion with how to make things better. Whether that is a friendship, your work relationship with your boss, your marriage, or your relationship with Christ. We are all human and fall short so we must always focus on how to be better with one another. If our marriage is the most important relationship here on Earth we must be open , honest and ready to always strive to make it better. I know that as a member of BNC whatever you guys learn through your counseling will be brought to us so we too can learn how to make our marriages better. Thanks for being so open and honest. We love you guys!!!
on 09 February 2010 / 10:23 AM
Phillip Taylor says,
My wife Shannon and I have received counseling at times throughout our marriage that has been priceless. Much of it has come in unplanned casual conversations with individuals we love and trust and who cared enough to speak into our lives. We will continue to hunger for truth that will strengthen us.
on 09 February 2010 / 12:44 PM
Faye says,
Ours is a second marriage for both of us, so we learned how to do all the wrong things before we got married and have chosen to not do those.
We’ve taken and taught marriage classes. We’ve gone on marriage retreats and take the time then to discuss what was talked about — how it applies to us.
So far, we’ve thrived through 19 years — the first ten included boys growing up, high school, boot camp, moving back in, then out, death of parents and so much more. Keeping God central has been key.
on 09 February 2010 / 7:42 PM
Stephanie Lindley says,
I think it’s wonderful! It is also a wonderful example for your children and your church. Thank you! Congratulations to Cindy for marrying such a wonderful man.
on 09 February 2010 / 7:49 PM
Kameron Richter says,
When you don’t seek counsel until there is something wrong, you’re setting yourself up to not trust what you’re hearing and, therefore, not take the action required to move forward.
We had counseling during a very difficult period in our lives and it was awful; but it wasn’t the counseling that was bad, it was the whole situation that led us there.
The same counseling, when things were good, would have allowed us to be as close as we are today, seven years ago.
Thank you for your leadership, O’Dells!
on 09 February 2010 / 8:22 PM
Unidentified says,
Thank you, Shannon, for being so open and transparent! Marriage counseling is a valuable tool that every couple should use. No matter how long you have been married, there is always so much to be learned.
With that said, I recommend you be very selective with who you choose to give you “counsel”. My husband and I met with a “Christian Counselor” whom we were referred to by our church, several years ago during a crisis in our marriage. Not once, during our sessions, was God ever mentioned, and every session revolved around “feelings”. Had we continued with this type of counseling our marriage would not have survived! Fortunately, we met Shannon O’Dell, began to attend BNC, and our lives were forever changed!! Just as with any relationship, seek GOOD COUNSEL, not bad!
on 10 February 2010 / 1:13 PM
TRESHA NOEL says,
Dear Shannon,
I want you to know that as I read your blog about Valentines I began to cry. I personally know of many, many marriages that could have been saved had the husbands responded to their wives asking them to go to a marriage counselor, in one case the wife begged her husband to go. Sadly most of the men thought their marriages were ok. Also even sadder is that not one of these marriages lasted. Thank you so much for being humble enough to realize that we will never “arrive” on this side of heaven and for being a role model to your precious church family. I appreciate you so much for all you do for my family and of course for Summer. How grateful we are. God is so AMAZING! I will continue to pray for you, your family and ministry. God bless you.
on 10 February 2010 / 5:52 PM
Erica says,
I LOVE this! #5 is my favorite. Thats a great footstep to follow… the others are fun and maybe romantic, but the other requires alot more personal thought and effort to humble ourselves to speak out about things that are so real. Good for you guys! I just love this…
on 12 February 2010 / 9:55 PM