Breaking All the Rurals

Cindy and I celebrated our 17th wedding anniversary this past weekend.  I am married to the most special woman on planet earth.  Cindy and I, are continuing to learn God’s plan for our lives as ONE here on earth.  Let me share just a few things I have learned the past 17 years:

#1 Spiritual Intimacy equals Marital Intimacy!
If I am bombing with my Groom (Jesus Christ), I will be failing with my wife. The closer I grow spiritually to God, the closer my relationship with Cindy.
#2 My guard must be up at all Times.
The moment I think I could never screw this relationship up, is the moment I will fail. It is a daily protection that I pray over my marriage and live out. So many couples end in divorce and they inevitably say, “I don’t know what happened”. Daily I guard my eyes, heart and emotions…DAILY!
#3 I have so much more to learn.
Just when I think I have her figured mentally, emotionally and physically it all changes. It is just like The Word of God, it is brand new every time I open it.
#4 Kids are Second, not First.
Cindy and I love our kids, but we prioritize each other first on our calendar, time and in our home. So many couples mistake family time means the kids. It means first your spouse, then your kiddos.  It begins in the bedroom, then the family room will be healthier.
#5 Romance Regular
Creating an atmosphere of romance is more fun today, than ever. My wife redecorated our bedroom this weekend, and I surprised her with a Caribbean cruise. Romance is Work, so roll up those sleeves and get creative.
#6 I am Selfish
My first inclination, often times, is to protect myself. What I forget…Cindy is me and I am her. “The two, become, ONE”.
#7 Ground Rules are a Must to Fight Fair.
Dr. Jonathan Cude shares with married couples, “Never waste a good fight”. Obviously, he is talking about verbal arguments. Here are some ground rules we use for arguments:
1)Never raise your voice. (That is tough for me)
2)Don’t call names.
3)Never touch in anger.
4)Don’t walk away.
5)Don’t freeze out your mate.
6)Don’t use the kids.
7)Don’t conflict angrily in front of the kids.
8)Don’t get historical. ( I remember when you….)
9)Don’t use your in-laws or parents-don’t go over to your parents house in argument.
10)Don’t reason with a hurt mate.
11)Never talk outside.
12)Don’t embarrass your mate in public.

#8 I am Cindy’s Pastor.
Not because I am a pastor, that is my role biblically. When I began to pastor my home (about 7 years ago) my influence in my wife’s life changed. She became more secure, confident and willing to follow.

I love what Cindy teaches me daily and I can’t wait for the next 17 years!